Peter Grant's so keen to get to Celtic, he'd pay the £2m...

Sir Alex Ferguson FOOTBALL? Bloody hell. My heid's dizzy from watching the managerial merry-go-round goin' round and round and round ... and then round a wee bit more.

But I'm delighted to see it seems to be gradually coming to a stop before I have to reach for the travel sickness pills.

Now, I could be wrong, which is very unlike me, but by the time you're reading this I reckon there's a pretty good chance that Tony Mowbray will be the new Celtic manager and I think that's a good move for the club.

Tony played a nice, free-flowing, passing, attacking, losing and ultimately relegation type of football at West Brom which I think will go down well with the Celtic fans - just so long as he avoids the relegation bit.

Mind you, for a wee while there, it was looking like a bit of a Mexican stand-off between Peter Lawwell and Jeremy Peace - obviously without the Mexicans - over the £2million compensation for Big Tony.

That seems to be sorted now, but I've no idea whether it's true or not that Peter Grant's so desperate to get to Celtic, he paid the £2m out of his savings.

As a former boss of Aberdeen, obviously I was interested to see my old player, Mark McGhee, land the Aberdeen job.

I'm sure he'll love having a director of football looking over his shoulder, telling him what to do.

What a coincidence all the same, the Aberdeen director of football being called Willie Miller, given that Willie Miller was the name of my captain when I was at Pittodrie. It cannae be the same one, though, because the Willie Miller I knew had a big, black, bushy hairstyle like the guy outta Boney M and a moustache like Magnum PI.

The Willie Miller that's the Aberdeen director of football is a wee baldy guy.

Mark's a very clever guy, though. I think he proved that when he said he would rather have the Celtic job but now that he's with Aberdeen he might as well do his best.

I'm sure the Dons fans will take to him instantly, especially if his first signing is an ex-Ranger, Stephen Hughes.

Nice to see John Yogi' Hughes getting the Easter Road job. Hibs have a great tradition of appointing a fans' favourite, refusing to give him any money to spend and then showing him the door a year later, so I'll watch that one with interest.

Now, there are still two very good jobs going in the SPL that would be perfect for young managers to start their apprenticeships by cutting their teeth on and they're at Falkirk and Motherwell.

Obviously there is no shortage of names being linked to these jobs.

The stumbling block for the new Motherwell boss is that he needs an agricultural background because - despite the new turf - he'll need to come up with excuses for the pitch come the winter.

As for Falkirk, I think it's interesting that a guy called Pressley, nicknamed Elvis, and John Hartson - who looks like thon Ralph Malph outta Happy Days must look like now - are interested, given that Falkirk is a place that feels as if it's trapped in the 1950s.

But enough about all that, what about my own club, what about the small matter of us losing the greatest player in the world?

Pwoud? No, not pwoud at all, nor pleased either, more like perplexed at what's been perpetrated by Real Madrid, but what can you say?

Okay, previously I'd pontificated that I wouldn't sell Real a virus - only to rescind that after they slapped 80 million quid on the table.

Oh, by the way, we had a whip round for Cristiano and, with the money raised, we bought a baseball bat that I used to chase him out of Old Trafford.

No' that I was annoyed or anything, you understand ... Mogga needs wonga wedge to be a whiner Charlie Nicholas Tony Mowbray? I like this kid. He has all the attributes attributed to him in spades BUT this board need to back him up and put their mouths where their money is. Striker-wise, Celtic need two front men of quality and I notice that Steven Fletcher of Hibs has said he could replace Jan Vennegoor of Hesselink BUT - and it's a big if - would Celtic want to pay the millions required? After all, let's be frankly brutal, a traffic cone could replace Big Jan and you can pick them up for hee-haw. Jimmy Calderwood Oh aye, y'know, I was affronted for Mark McGhee exposing himself like that on the telly. I mean, we all know he's a Sellic man, but there's no need to rub it in the Aberdeen fans' faces and make them feel that their club was second choice. To be fair, I don't think it'll matter. After all, me, Jimmy Nick and Sandy Clark are all big, BIG Rangers men and it never caused us any problems at Pittodrie. Gordon Strachan Am I keeping quiet? Aye. Am I just keepin' my heid down? Aye. Was the real reason I quit the new Celtic away strip wi' the tartan shorts? No comment. Pat Nevin Now that's interesting. Due to pitch work at Fir Park, Motherwell will have to play their Europa League qualifiers in Airdrie. I hate to be pedantic, but is Airdrie part of Europe? Kenny Dalglish What does Kenny Dalglish think of a Russian guy taking over Setanta? Well, you know what these Eastern Europeans are like once they get involved wi' football. They start making decisions they shouldnae. So, you never know, he might start interfering with the Setanta schedules and instead of all they Scottish football programmes wi' Jim Delahunt and Stuart Lovell and Scott Booth there could be editions of Russian programmes like Riverski City or Taggartski. Actually, that wouldnae be a bad idea. Chick Young Yes, it's true, I can exclusively reveal that the BBC are to slash the wages of top entertainers, so that's bad news for Jonathan Ross, Graham Norton, Bruce Forsyth - and, eh, Chico.