THERE are times when New Labour's bossy urge to nanny folk reaches into the realm of Alice in Wonderland.

For, now, the government is ordering councils to develop strategies for walking - or risk losing millions of pounds of state money for improving bus services, parking and roads if they don't.

I would have thought that the only strategy anyone needs for walking is a plan to put one foot in front of the other.

But, no, the car-hating cranks behind this policy want walking to be part of councils' Local Transport Plan because it is "a low-cost, healthy and socially-inclusive way of travelling."

Is not that a phrase that come straight out of the veggie-eco-freaks' save-the-planet text book - light years away from reality?

All this pious talk about the benefits of walking and councils being made to take walking seriously, so that, as a spokeswoman for Jag-owning John Prescott's department put it, people no longer jump into the car for a trip to the shops and crocodiles of children go to and from school on foot is pure piffle.

I do not know how often Mr Prescott or his policy drafters have slogged with a kiddies' push-chair and handfuls of carrier bags in the pouring rain from an out-of-town supermarket or would be happy for their children on the streets coming or going from school when there are perverts at loose on early release from jail, but I would suspect it is not a lot - if they can seriously advocate this nonsense.

But seeing as how, in connection with this idiocy, councils are being told to plan for more road charges for car users and for fees for motorists parking at work, the dictatorial "You vill walk!" madness must, alas, be taken seriously.

Converted for the new archive on 14 July 2000. Some images and formatting may have been lost in the conversion.