I SHALL no longer scoff at people wearing safety hats and goggles in DIY and gardening programmes.

I've discovered the sense in using them at last, but it's taken an eye injury for me to realise they're not daft regulations.

I decided to prune a tall clematis at the weekend, but it got the better of me and poked me in the eye. I couldn't expose the bloodshot eyeball to light for three days and boy did I suffer.

I learned a health and safety lesson the hard way.