DEAR MASSI, I have done something really stupid and I am afraid of telling anyone about it.

I am married man with two children and over the past year I have spent all my savings and even borrowed £5000 from friends and loan companies. My wife doesn't know about this and I am ashamed of telling her. I have spent all the money gambling.

I make sure all my letters go another address. Sshe has asked me about this and I say it is because everything is registered in another name. She trusts me.

I have earned some of the money back and paid off some people but the outstanding debt is still making my life a misery.

I don't what she will do when she finds out.

When she asks me we should go shopping or spend some money on the house I make some excuse up. I don't know what to do and wish there was a way out.

LK

Preston

MASSI SAYS,

First of all you must realise this cannot go on. You have to curb your gambling habit one way or another and there is plenty of help available.

Secondly you must tell your wife because the longer you leave it the worse it is going to get. She has a right to know and whilst you may well feel ashamed she may after the intial anger realise she has to support you.

Obviously she is going to be upset, but wouldn't you be if the tables were turned. If your relationship is strong enough you will battle through this.

As you have borrowed from your friends have you thought how your wife will feel if she finds out from another person?

You cannot continue with your habit by borrowing from one source to pay off other people. You may want to contact Gamblers anonymous on 0161 976 5000. The group meet to do something about their own gambling problem and to help other gamblers do the same. Make the first step.