DEAR MASSI, I have been married for four years and I thought everything between us was fine.

However, in the past couple of months I have noticed my husband coming home very late at night and always being 'off' with me. Even during the Eid festivals earlier this year he only spent two or three hours at home.

My friends say he must be with some other woman. But I just can't find it in my heart to confront him. He has always been kind to me despite me not being able to have any children.

We live on our own but his in-laws are not far from us. They are also very good to me and treat me like their own daughter.

I wish I knew what his problem was. Communication between us has more or less stopped and we never go out anywhere anymore. I have my suspicions but I don't have the nerve to talk to him. I don't know why not.

He lets me do what I want most of the time and is very supportive when I take up new hobbies.

I did check his mobile phone and his bank bills but there doesn''t seem to be anything out of the ordinary.

What can I do? Is there a way of finding out without having to argue because if I am wrong he will think I am being too possessive.

Anonymous

MASSI SAYS,

From what you say it looks like you are afraid of him admitting he is having an affair.

And by not talking about the issue you think it will go away. Obviously it won't and it will continue to play your mind until you talk to him.

You may find there are other reasons for his strange behaviour. You say you have checked his phone and bank bills therefore it is obvious you are curious to find out why he is acting differently towards you.

You must make the first move becuase it seems your husband will be content to continue in this new ways unless you talk to him.

If you get on with your in-laws it might be an idea to talk to his sister or brother and tell them how you feel. This might cause him to wake up and realise he is hurting you.

Just because you are talking to your husband doesn't mean you being too possesive and don't think this will drive him away. You have a right to know what is up with him. You might find he is glad you brought the subject up.